When You Want to Know Yourself More Deeply Than a Personality Test

You screenshot your results and post them in the group chat. Replies pile up: “That is so you,” “Chills.” That night, lying in bed, you slowly reread the description and stop at one sentence. “When conflict comes up, you face it head-on instead of avoiding it.” At work, that's true. But you've never once done that with your mom. Most of it has you nodding along, but a few lines keep snagging.

Those few snagging lines don't necessarily mean the test got it wrong. It's that a person has too many sides to fit on a single page of results. In this piece, we'll talk about what a personality test can tell you and what it can't, and what you can try if you want to go one step beyond your results.

01A test is a summary of your answers

A personality test gathers your answers to its questions and sums up which way, and how far, you lean on each trait. There are two things packed into that.

One is that tests are genuinely useful. They put names to tendencies that were scattered all over the place, and turn vague feelings into words like “high in sociability” or “a wide emotional amplitude.” For the first time, you have a language for describing yourself. That's also why familiar type tests like MBTI are so welcome to so many people.

The other is that a test can't know more than your answers. The scenes you pictured as you answered, your mood that day, and the way you see yourself all get mixed into those answers. If you take a test during a period when you're especially hard on yourself, the results can come out a little harsher, even though you're the same person. So your results are less the right answer about you and more a map of how you see yourself right now.

02What a test can answer, and what you have to find outside it

The middle column gets fairly clear with a test. The right column is something a test can't do for you. When you want to know yourself more deeply, the place you get stuck is usually on the right. For example, a result saying you're high in accommodation tells you that you go along with others easily, but not why. Whether it's because you want to protect the relationship or because conflict scares you is something only you can answer. “What do I want?” in particular is a question one layer below personality, so it helps to look at motivation separately, as in The 9 core desires that drive you.

03The sentences that snag hold the clues

The sentences that snag as you read your results aren't something to toss aside; they're the part most worth your attention. They usually snag for one of three reasons.

First, you sit near the middle on that trait. On a trait where you don't lean strongly either way, descriptions of what one end looks like feel awkward. For someone around the middle on sociability, a sentence like “You get energy from being around people” is true on some days and not on others, so it snags in a vague way.

Second, your social self and private self differ on that trait. The “you face conflict head-on” from the opening scene, true at work and not true with your mom, is exactly this case. Your social self, the you around people, and your private self, the you when alone or with someone very close, may be far apart on accommodation.

Third, it's an area the test didn't ask about. Values, the experiences you've been through, and your current situation lie outside the questions. If the description guessed at those, it's natural for it not to fit. A sentence like “You like stable jobs” may have more to do with your current circumstances than with your personality.

04Check for yourself whether these results are worth trusting

There's something to watch just as carefully as the sentences that snag: sentences that fit a little too well. A sentence like “You may seem bright on the outside, but sometimes you feel lonely inside” fits almost anyone who reads it. The more sentences like that, the nicer the results feel to read, but the less they tell you that's new. Once you have your results, run through the following.

• Do they show how far you lean on each trait, not just letters or a type name?
• Are there more specific sentences that fit only you than sentences that would fit a friend just as well?
• Do they go beyond listing good points and also tell you about the difficulties that trait tends to bring?
• Do they avoid making definite claims about your future or your emotional struggles?
• Can you take it again in a few months and compare what moved?

The more “yes” answers, the more those results are worth reading deeply. If you get a lot of “no,” it's fine to enjoy them for fun and move on lightly.

05Going one step beyond your results

06How not to read this

• Don't use your results as an excuse. “I'm just that type” tends to end the conversation rather than explain anything. It's better to use results to understand yourself, not to excuse yourself from how you act.
• If a description doesn't fit, that doesn't mean something's wrong with you. A single description is written with many people who got the same result in mind, so it can't capture every detail of the one person that is you.
• It doesn't mean the test knows you better than you know yourself, either. If your results clash with your experience, looking closely at that clash is the path to deeper understanding.
• It isn't a diagnosis, either. A personality test only shows tendencies; it doesn't judge emotional struggles.

07A single page of results is a starting point

The moment you first saw your results and thought “That's me” is precious. If you don't stop there but follow the sentences that snag, a single page of results unfolds into the you across many settings. From then on, your results aren't a name that pins you down but a map for getting to know yourself better.

The free personality test shows your five traits split into the you around people and the you alone. Because it's split into two settings from the start, it's much easier to pin down which setting a snagging sentence is really about.

This piece is meant to help you understand yourself and does not replace psychological diagnosis or treatment. If you're dealing with difficulties that have gone on for a long time, talk with a professional.